I get that I had a traumatic birth experience with him. I get that I had postpartum depression. I get that mental illness robs you of your memories. But I swear I better get them back in the next life or, really, I may start to question what this is all about.
Now I gotta go sneak into that little dude's room and lay with him so my heart will stop breaking. Hopefully, he'll wake up and make some rude remark and set my world right again.
2 comments:
Gabe's head is ginormous. The one good thing is he still looks like that! (And apparently you can still hold him like a baby when you need to) ;)
lots of things rob you of your memories. mental illness is one. having your kids 14 months apart is another. oh look! i got double whamied! hope it doesnt sound like your sisters lack empathy. i empathize...i just know fewer people than you think dont have a whole lot of the memories you think they do. i used to think i was robbed cuz all my kids were in the nicu and never in my room with me where i could hold and love them and then take them home. then i realized lots of women are too tired or sick themselves or depressed to hole their baby. bottom line: we all get jipped somehow. yes?
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