Just for the record, I hate titling my posts.
Ok, so I ordered the pizza from the last post, and I had a total and complete blackout. I mean FLASHBACK. Seriously! I cannot think straight!! I ordered Domino's cheese pizza. When I opened the box...
Wham! Not the group. I was seriously, for one solid second, back in college. I could see it, smell it, hear it, and totally FEEL exactly how I felt then. A second doesn't seem long, but when that happens, you feel transported.
Why, do you ask? Because, the last thing I did before I left college (dropped out, if you will) was work a summer in Helaman Halls as a CA, or Conference Assistant. Conferences were from Monday through Saturday morning with early arrivals allowed on Sunday evening. So, the cafeteria was closed after Saturday breakfast and not opened again until Sunday dinner. As employees, we could, of course, eat up at the Morris center at DT, but that particular administration made it pretty hard (plus I'm lazy). THEREFORE, only one of two things happened every weekend: a) I "fasted" from breakfast Saturday to dinner Sunday, or b) I ordered a cheese pizza from Domino's on Saturday afternoon, and ate half that night and half the next day accompanied by the Dr. Peppers in the minifridge under my bed.
The smell of the pizza tonight was the EXACT experience from those weekends. Actually one of the very limited good memories I have of college.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Friday!!! (the unedited director's cut1)
Not that it matters. Andy works Saturdays also, so this isn't a weekend starter. But we swam today so the kids are wiped out. I'm ordering a pizza. I need vitamin e since I keep burning and wrinkling. i wish there was a vitamin to lift post-nursing boobs. I'd take it till they bopped my chin. Sorry, brother.
What to do tonight? I'm ordering pizza, so I don't care about dinner out. Maybe a movie. I don't think Andy has seen Indy yet, so maybe? I hate getting babysitting. I went to the gym for a 9:45 class. That means I left at 9:15 am, and I got back home at 4:15. How many hours is that? Whatever it is, it's long. I don't really like to come home once I leave. Plus, I burnt the roast into a charcoal briquette last night and the house smells like nasty. the smoke smell has a distinct cigarette smell. I ran out of Febreze. I'm burning those little Febreze candles. It only sorta helps. The pot is still outside in the wheelbarrow. I thought I had burned the house down.
I gotta go order this pizza. To bad I don't drink Coke anymore - that is the perfect compliment. Sometimes it makes me feel like my right hand is lopped off. Really, like I grew another hand. Where it was once solely occupied holding a can and therefore unavailable, it is now just flopping around lacking purpose. I'll have to get root beer. That is the runner up compliment to pizza.
1I didn't, what's it called, round up my thoughts as usual. Since I'm cracking up. MARSHAL. I didn't marshal them. This is me on a good day in the mental fog of disjointed thinking called I am not on mania meds and I think I need them. So, there you have it. Good day. I said Good Day!
What to do tonight? I'm ordering pizza, so I don't care about dinner out. Maybe a movie. I don't think Andy has seen Indy yet, so maybe? I hate getting babysitting. I went to the gym for a 9:45 class. That means I left at 9:15 am, and I got back home at 4:15. How many hours is that? Whatever it is, it's long. I don't really like to come home once I leave. Plus, I burnt the roast into a charcoal briquette last night and the house smells like nasty. the smoke smell has a distinct cigarette smell. I ran out of Febreze. I'm burning those little Febreze candles. It only sorta helps. The pot is still outside in the wheelbarrow. I thought I had burned the house down.
I gotta go order this pizza. To bad I don't drink Coke anymore - that is the perfect compliment. Sometimes it makes me feel like my right hand is lopped off. Really, like I grew another hand. Where it was once solely occupied holding a can and therefore unavailable, it is now just flopping around lacking purpose. I'll have to get root beer. That is the runner up compliment to pizza.
1I didn't, what's it called, round up my thoughts as usual. Since I'm cracking up. MARSHAL. I didn't marshal them. This is me on a good day in the mental fog of disjointed thinking called I am not on mania meds and I think I need them. So, there you have it. Good day. I said Good Day!
Thursday, May 29, 2008
I need SuperScheduler
SuperBanker is still in action. Sometimes she waits until the moment of crisis, but she still comes out on top. However, my scheduling is lacking. And then, when I finally get today worked out: my sister is going to take all three kids while I'm at a 9am dentist appointment and drop off Claire at a party at 10:30, then I will get Charlotte and Gabe after the dentist and have Sarah pick up Claire so my other kids don't crash the party, and then I'll spend the day prepping for my stake meeting tonight...ok, after that, Claire wakes up around 6:30 this morning asking for a bowl. That's kid code for, "I'm going to throw up."
Alright, go into throw up mode1. I get a bowl. Then I tell her that I really think that she is too hungry. She slept through dinner last night. I get her some dry cereal, half a banana, and a glass of milk. I sit and encourage her to take little bites. She keeps hovering over the bowl with her little hand over her mouth.
I go cancel my babysitting and my dentist appointment. They ask me if I want to reschedule, but I say no. I have three kids. There is no telling who will get sick next. I decide not to call the party and cancel b/c I didn't actually RSVP. (Didn't I mention I have scheduling difficulties?)
Alright, so since she isn't eating, I get her settled on the couch with her bowl. She keeps trying to get up. I keep settling her back. Finally, she says she's hungry, and she eats breakfast. Turns out she was just hungry afterall. So, I did all that responsible, inconvenient stuff for nothing.
Now, they are upstairs playing. I'm wondering how long it will take them to notice I liquidated over half of their stock. Claire might not, but Charlotte has every toy catalogued.
1Like the poop cleaning, this is another thing that nobody teaches you before you have kids. I guess it is, aside from janitorial training, a hands-on learning sitch. My best advice: don't be afraid of the puke. It can't hurt you. It can only make you puke. Notice the catch 22.
Alright, go into throw up mode1. I get a bowl. Then I tell her that I really think that she is too hungry. She slept through dinner last night. I get her some dry cereal, half a banana, and a glass of milk. I sit and encourage her to take little bites. She keeps hovering over the bowl with her little hand over her mouth.
I go cancel my babysitting and my dentist appointment. They ask me if I want to reschedule, but I say no. I have three kids. There is no telling who will get sick next. I decide not to call the party and cancel b/c I didn't actually RSVP. (Didn't I mention I have scheduling difficulties?)
Alright, so since she isn't eating, I get her settled on the couch with her bowl. She keeps trying to get up. I keep settling her back. Finally, she says she's hungry, and she eats breakfast. Turns out she was just hungry afterall. So, I did all that responsible, inconvenient stuff for nothing.
Now, they are upstairs playing. I'm wondering how long it will take them to notice I liquidated over half of their stock. Claire might not, but Charlotte has every toy catalogued.
1Like the poop cleaning, this is another thing that nobody teaches you before you have kids. I guess it is, aside from janitorial training, a hands-on learning sitch. My best advice: don't be afraid of the puke. It can't hurt you. It can only make you puke. Notice the catch 22.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
My favorite pasttime
I have been reading almost constantly for the past couple of days, and it is so GREAT! Before I had kids I read like this, and I really miss it. The girls are with their dad today, and Gabe is sleeping, so I'm off to read "The Wednesday Letters" before I forget. I'm in such a brain fog lately I can remember nothing.
Like today when I tried to go to the dentist until I realized it is tomorrow. And I planned for Claire to go to a birthday party on Friday when it is tomorrow during my dentist appointment. And I have a stake meeting tomorrow also which I am unprepared for. I traded one set of mental challenges for an entirely new set.
Like today when I tried to go to the dentist until I realized it is tomorrow. And I planned for Claire to go to a birthday party on Friday when it is tomorrow during my dentist appointment. And I have a stake meeting tomorrow also which I am unprepared for. I traded one set of mental challenges for an entirely new set.
Monday, May 26, 2008
Minor Breakdown
So, Claire smacked the back of her head on the edge of the coffee table yesterday morning. I lost it. This has happened to my kids COUNTLESS times because they are jumping on the furniture or running in the house. I'm angry! JUST OBEY and you won't get hurt all the time!!! So, as I am holding and rocking her, I slam my hand down on the coffee table and shout through tears, "STOP! jumping on the furniture!" Charlotte sorta walked out of the room. Claire kept on with the crying until she BIT MY SHOULDER. I thumped her back so she would let go, and then I sent them upstairs.
I couldn't stop sobbing. I promptly dragged the coffee table out of the room and dumped it out the back door. I pulled almost everything out of the laundry room1 and threw it out as well. I saw broken glass and rusty nails all over the driveway. I sobbed as I swept up all in plain sight. I sobbed on the phone to Andy (he was out of town from Sunday morning to Saturday night) about cleaning up the outside and getting rid of all the construction mess. I sobbed b/c I am sick and tired of my house being hazardous to my children's well-being. And, mostly, I sobbed b/c they keep disobeying and getting hurt. Claire burned her finger on a hot pan after I told her to stay out of the kitchen (I tell them this daily) when I'm cooking; Gabe got a fat lip today sliding on some toy on the floor. Not his first.
Bloody noses, fat lips, bitten tongues, goose eggs on heads. I actually do not want to kiss any more owies. They make me angry. I have actually said, "NO MORE OWIES TODAY." They disobey and they are perpetually tired and refuse napping and refuse to sleep when they are put to bed and refuse to sleep to a decent hour in the morning. I actually felt like calling someone yesterday and saying, "Please come get my kids; I can't keep them safe." Do you know what that feels like, as a mom? It is indescribably horrible and damaging and guilt-laden. I can't empty my house completely, I can't keep them indoors perpetually, I can't ground them for getting hurt.
I am pondering and praying over a new disciplinary institution in the home. They have outgrown timeouts. They need more than a good talking-to. I'm a little better today. Only a little. Andy is home, so I stayed in my room alone for the majority of the non-church hours.
1Don't ask me why the laundry room. It has been bothering me a lot, and it is right at the back door, and I didn't want to start throwing more living room furniture out. Like the chairs they jump on and the end table they play under and bonk their heads on, and the piano bench they fall off of, and the rug they trip on, and the couch cushions they almost smother each other with. To name a few.
I couldn't stop sobbing. I promptly dragged the coffee table out of the room and dumped it out the back door. I pulled almost everything out of the laundry room1 and threw it out as well. I saw broken glass and rusty nails all over the driveway. I sobbed as I swept up all in plain sight. I sobbed on the phone to Andy (he was out of town from Sunday morning to Saturday night) about cleaning up the outside and getting rid of all the construction mess. I sobbed b/c I am sick and tired of my house being hazardous to my children's well-being. And, mostly, I sobbed b/c they keep disobeying and getting hurt. Claire burned her finger on a hot pan after I told her to stay out of the kitchen (I tell them this daily) when I'm cooking; Gabe got a fat lip today sliding on some toy on the floor. Not his first.
Bloody noses, fat lips, bitten tongues, goose eggs on heads. I actually do not want to kiss any more owies. They make me angry. I have actually said, "NO MORE OWIES TODAY." They disobey and they are perpetually tired and refuse napping and refuse to sleep when they are put to bed and refuse to sleep to a decent hour in the morning. I actually felt like calling someone yesterday and saying, "Please come get my kids; I can't keep them safe." Do you know what that feels like, as a mom? It is indescribably horrible and damaging and guilt-laden. I can't empty my house completely, I can't keep them indoors perpetually, I can't ground them for getting hurt.
I am pondering and praying over a new disciplinary institution in the home. They have outgrown timeouts. They need more than a good talking-to. I'm a little better today. Only a little. Andy is home, so I stayed in my room alone for the majority of the non-church hours.
1Don't ask me why the laundry room. It has been bothering me a lot, and it is right at the back door, and I didn't want to start throwing more living room furniture out. Like the chairs they jump on and the end table they play under and bonk their heads on, and the piano bench they fall off of, and the rug they trip on, and the couch cushions they almost smother each other with. To name a few.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
It was not yoga.
It was Pilates. I haven't done that in, probably, six months. And I haven't exercised at all in, like, 3 (I've swum laps a few times, though). So, I was not prepared. And now I can't move. It is a miracle my little fingers are wiggling enough to type this out. But I was right about the hilarity of the class (see last post). The instructor is one I have regularly, so we know each other's names and hang out a bit outside the classes. She's been hollering at me to get my butt back up there. So, I do. EVERYTHING was working against me going since I didn't really want to go. I'll list them, and I'll just let you know now that ANY ONE of these things would have totally stopped me from going at any time:
I didn't have clothes - I went home and got them
I didn't have my gym card - I used my license (that means I don't get a locker)
I couldn't find shoes for Char that weren't filled with mud - she wore muddy shoes
I couldn't find a bottle or pants for Gabe - bottleless onesie, unsnapped, mind you
I was late - got over busting into a peaceful workout 15 minutes into it, stepping over everyone on their mats to get my own, stepping back over everyone to find a spot RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR AND NEXT TO THE INSTRUCTOR
I stepped in mud outside - muddy bare feet in class.
That last was actually the biggest one. This is a barefoot class. Everyone's bare feet are up in the air or pointed at you. The teacher, Leanna, who was staring at them for the first few exercises, finally said, "What is ON your feet?" I just kept single leg stretching and said, "I stepped in mud." She had already called me out when I got there late, "Oh my gosh, is that JENNIFER?" I have to say, she is my very most fave instructor I've ever had. Ever.
So, I overcame the whelming odds. I giggled every time I saw my black-bottomed feet in the mirror up against all those pink scrubbed feet (including 2 men's which is a first in that class for me). I rewarded myself with 13 peanut butter cookies and a liter of rootbeer for dinner (oh, and McDonald's for lunch, and I am NOT talking about salad.) Man, I am SO into physical fitness!!!
I didn't have clothes - I went home and got them
I didn't have my gym card - I used my license (that means I don't get a locker)
I couldn't find shoes for Char that weren't filled with mud - she wore muddy shoes
I couldn't find a bottle or pants for Gabe - bottleless onesie, unsnapped, mind you
I was late - got over busting into a peaceful workout 15 minutes into it, stepping over everyone on their mats to get my own, stepping back over everyone to find a spot RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR AND NEXT TO THE INSTRUCTOR
I stepped in mud outside - muddy bare feet in class.
That last was actually the biggest one. This is a barefoot class. Everyone's bare feet are up in the air or pointed at you. The teacher, Leanna, who was staring at them for the first few exercises, finally said, "What is ON your feet?" I just kept single leg stretching and said, "I stepped in mud." She had already called me out when I got there late, "Oh my gosh, is that JENNIFER?" I have to say, she is my very most fave instructor I've ever had. Ever.
So, I overcame the whelming odds. I giggled every time I saw my black-bottomed feet in the mirror up against all those pink scrubbed feet (including 2 men's which is a first in that class for me). I rewarded myself with 13 peanut butter cookies and a liter of rootbeer for dinner (oh, and McDonald's for lunch, and I am NOT talking about salad.) Man, I am SO into physical fitness!!!
Friday, May 23, 2008
I love to laugh, HA HA HA HA!
Loud and long and clear!
That's Mary Poppins, y'all. Remember Uncle Albert? The one bouncing along the ceiling in hysterics? Yes, well, he is an excellent personification of how I feel bipolar is. Oh, yes. I can see mental illness everywhere! He was so hilariously happy about everything, and then, one sad thing, and he plonks to the ground sobbing. Not being able to get back up to the ceiling again. Oh, Uncle Albert, I understand!!!
We slept over at Grandma's last night, and my kids watched (most of) Mary Poppins for the first time. I'd recommend you do that - watch Mary Poppins with children who have never seen it. It brings back all those feelings of wonder and excitement that I felt as a child when I watched it.
Alas, back to real life. I have to drive home to take my meds (of COURSE I forgot them. Although packing really does only consist of me throwing handfuls of diapers and wipes into the car and leaving.) and change to go to yoga. I haven't been in forever, and I was kicked on both sides all night long as I slept between the girls, so I am sure that I'll make an utter fool of myself. That really is worth it in yoga. What other humor are you gonna get in there? Yoga, like the steam room and sauna, has been made into a rather dour place. Delana and I like to jazz it up :) We laugh a lot, whisper, and sit around and talk when it's over. Not very shavinasenah of us.
That's Mary Poppins, y'all. Remember Uncle Albert? The one bouncing along the ceiling in hysterics? Yes, well, he is an excellent personification of how I feel bipolar is. Oh, yes. I can see mental illness everywhere! He was so hilariously happy about everything, and then, one sad thing, and he plonks to the ground sobbing. Not being able to get back up to the ceiling again. Oh, Uncle Albert, I understand!!!
We slept over at Grandma's last night, and my kids watched (most of) Mary Poppins for the first time. I'd recommend you do that - watch Mary Poppins with children who have never seen it. It brings back all those feelings of wonder and excitement that I felt as a child when I watched it.
Alas, back to real life. I have to drive home to take my meds (of COURSE I forgot them. Although packing really does only consist of me throwing handfuls of diapers and wipes into the car and leaving.) and change to go to yoga. I haven't been in forever, and I was kicked on both sides all night long as I slept between the girls, so I am sure that I'll make an utter fool of myself. That really is worth it in yoga. What other humor are you gonna get in there? Yoga, like the steam room and sauna, has been made into a rather dour place. Delana and I like to jazz it up :) We laugh a lot, whisper, and sit around and talk when it's over. Not very shavinasenah of us.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
WORST treasure hunt EVER!
Gabe took off his poopy diaper in his crib (2nd time). Yes, there was poop. He was staring between his bare legs, apparently waiting for more. This is one of those things that nobody has ever taught you to clean up (or prepared you for having to clean it up). I have only discovered two ways to do it: pooper scooper style and beggar's purse style. This time, I chose pooper scooper. He had to wait screaming at me from his crib while I hunted all over the floor and down the sides of the mattress to make sure I didn't miss any. This kind of treasure is a lose-lose. You lose if you find it, and you lose in a day or two if you don't. Then straight to the bath, then back up to strip the bed, Lysol it down, and bleach the, well, poop out of the bedding. New rule: clothes from the waist down REQUIRED at bedtime!!!
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
I was WRONG!
Ok, Mireille was NOT on CSI: Miami last night. She was on a previous episode, which you can see online. I either got the date wrong (most likely), her mom told me wrong (less likely), or they changed the air date (impossible, the shows have a continuing plot). I feel responsible for anyone who had to watch last night's episode because I thought it was boring.
Monday, May 19, 2008
TV!!!!
Ok, the big news first...
NCIS season finale tomorrow is two hours long!!!
This is my show. MY SHOW. Are you hearing me? You people who have shows, you know. I have only one. Just this one. I have only missed one this season, and, thanks to the glorious internet, I got to see it online. So, I will not answer the phone or the door or my kids or nature's call or anything from 7-9 p.m. Texas time tomorrow.
On another happy note, my friend Mireille Enos will be in CSI: Miami tonight. Everybody watch it! She is playing Lucy Maddox. She was also on last week's episode of Medium; you can watch it online. She was Kelly who hears sounds in her house. (Warning: the episode is extremely upsetting to me as a mother, and I closed my ears and eyes for a lot of it.) She is a regular on Big Love if you watch it. She's Kathy and Kathy's twin. She has auditioned for NCIS, and I tell you, when she gets a part, I will not be able to contain myself. I'll ask her to please please have Agent Gibbs autograph ANYTHING for me! I will make her tell me EVERY SECOND of filming!!
Sunday
Five hours at church, three kids, 1 mom, no help. Does that sum it up for you?
Andy went out of town, and I had a stake meeting at another ward building. I had asked my neice to come and entertain/watch over the kids while I met, but she was ill. So, off I go to a ward that meets at noon. However, scheduling was off, so we didn't meet until the whole block was over at 3pm. My kids went to primary, and I sent Gabe to the nursery regardless him being a month shy of 18 months. He did ok until the end. I could hear him crying, and I went in to find him sitting in a tiny chair, eating snacks, sobbing the whole time. Out he came with me. The ward being over, we took over the cultural hall to plan the stake primary activity day. I will be forever grateful to the husband of one of the presidency who played with the kids until the meeting ended at 5pm. And the kids really were great. Really great. I'm proud of them. But a baby can only take so much before he needs to nap. They had eaten the string cheese and the cereal and the secret weapon (chocolate) and drunk the water. When we finally left, Gabe conked in the car, the girls were starving, and I couldn't even see myself pouring a bottle of milk much less make dinner. I mean, that was a lunchless day. Straight to my mom's. Hot meal, chocolate chip cookies, a game of Parcheesi (the royal game of India, you know), and I was replenished. Gabe had napped, and we were ready to go home.
Craig and Jessica (bro and sister in law) came over, and I made them stay until 3:45 a.m. so I didn't have to go to bed alone. I find myself staying up until I am stumbling-drunk sleepy when Andy is out of town. That was 4:30 a.m. in this instance. So, of course, I ruined today. I feel like crying. I feel like getting out of here, but the price of gas... I also feel like ordering pizza and getting McDonald's, but, once again, responsible spending. Remember SuperBanker? I'm not ready to forfeit my cape.
Then there is the issue of FHE. What will I do? I can't play Battleship1 without Andy on the other team. I guess we could take a nature walk. We do that every afternoon, though. And we read our scriptures every day. Oh, I got it! Write/draw to Mamu and Papu! I have an envelope to send them with some little things from Charlotte's preschool. Phew!
1This is our default FHE. It is probably 25% of our Monday nights. The kids beg to play it. So Rugglesy.
Andy went out of town, and I had a stake meeting at another ward building. I had asked my neice to come and entertain/watch over the kids while I met, but she was ill. So, off I go to a ward that meets at noon. However, scheduling was off, so we didn't meet until the whole block was over at 3pm. My kids went to primary, and I sent Gabe to the nursery regardless him being a month shy of 18 months. He did ok until the end. I could hear him crying, and I went in to find him sitting in a tiny chair, eating snacks, sobbing the whole time. Out he came with me. The ward being over, we took over the cultural hall to plan the stake primary activity day. I will be forever grateful to the husband of one of the presidency who played with the kids until the meeting ended at 5pm. And the kids really were great. Really great. I'm proud of them. But a baby can only take so much before he needs to nap. They had eaten the string cheese and the cereal and the secret weapon (chocolate) and drunk the water. When we finally left, Gabe conked in the car, the girls were starving, and I couldn't even see myself pouring a bottle of milk much less make dinner. I mean, that was a lunchless day. Straight to my mom's. Hot meal, chocolate chip cookies, a game of Parcheesi (the royal game of India, you know), and I was replenished. Gabe had napped, and we were ready to go home.
Craig and Jessica (bro and sister in law) came over, and I made them stay until 3:45 a.m. so I didn't have to go to bed alone. I find myself staying up until I am stumbling-drunk sleepy when Andy is out of town. That was 4:30 a.m. in this instance. So, of course, I ruined today. I feel like crying. I feel like getting out of here, but the price of gas... I also feel like ordering pizza and getting McDonald's, but, once again, responsible spending. Remember SuperBanker? I'm not ready to forfeit my cape.
Then there is the issue of FHE. What will I do? I can't play Battleship1 without Andy on the other team. I guess we could take a nature walk. We do that every afternoon, though. And we read our scriptures every day. Oh, I got it! Write/draw to Mamu and Papu! I have an envelope to send them with some little things from Charlotte's preschool. Phew!
1This is our default FHE. It is probably 25% of our Monday nights. The kids beg to play it. So Rugglesy.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Mommyhood
From Chanda's blog. Carrie, do it too! And David, I wanna see your list. Yes, you aren't a mommy, nor will you ever be one (I hope!), so modify to yourself and your family/friends. I trust your writer's initiative on this one1.
How long have I been a mom?
5 1/2 years
How old was I when I became a mom?
25 years old
What is my favorite kid show?
I LOVE kid shows! Right now, probably "Johnny Test."
Least favorite?
The Koala Brothers; Yo Gabba Gabba
Favorite chore
Balancing the checkbook
Favorite meal to cook?
Pepperoncini sandwiches. (3 ingredients, crockpot, PRESTO!)
What is the meal cooked most often?
Chicken. Chicken and rice and veggies. In any variety.
What's my kids' favorite meal?
Mac and Cheese, hands down!
What is my favorite thing Andy does with the kids?
It's a tie: Bedtime routine (the tucking in and reading stories and singing songs),
and taking them with him to work.
What are 5 things that make me smile about being a mom?
1. The hilarious things they say.
2. When they play with each other
3. When they tell me how much they love me
4. When they make me cards and towers and pictures
5. When they play "Moms and Hons." They call kids "hons." They are my hons, NayNay and Gwenie are Carrie's hons. They'll ask you how many hons you have.
Where do I want to take my kids someday?
Disney World. For real. I've never been.
When was the last time Andy and I went out without the kids?
Last Friday, I think. We saw "Ironman." Totally good.
What's something you said you'd never do as a mom?
Tell my kids to stop crying. (Fussing, yes. Crying, no.)
Favorite pasttime with my kids?
Schoolwork. They like to do any learning activities, so we do worksheets.
Advice for new moms?
Let your spouse parent. It won't be the same as you.
What is a scary or heartbreaking moment you have had as a mom?
When Claire was about 18 months, I came home Sunday morning after a run to my sister's to get sugar or something, and she was out in the middle of the road. It was many days before I recovered. Many.
When was the last time your kids said "I love you?"
When I let them have computer time this morning.
1If you screw it up, I won't publish you.
How long have I been a mom?
5 1/2 years
How old was I when I became a mom?
25 years old
What is my favorite kid show?
I LOVE kid shows! Right now, probably "Johnny Test."
Least favorite?
The Koala Brothers; Yo Gabba Gabba
Favorite chore
Balancing the checkbook
Favorite meal to cook?
Pepperoncini sandwiches. (3 ingredients, crockpot, PRESTO!)
What is the meal cooked most often?
Chicken. Chicken and rice and veggies. In any variety.
What's my kids' favorite meal?
Mac and Cheese, hands down!
What is my favorite thing Andy does with the kids?
It's a tie: Bedtime routine (the tucking in and reading stories and singing songs),
and taking them with him to work.
What are 5 things that make me smile about being a mom?
1. The hilarious things they say.
2. When they play with each other
3. When they tell me how much they love me
4. When they make me cards and towers and pictures
5. When they play "Moms and Hons." They call kids "hons." They are my hons, NayNay and Gwenie are Carrie's hons. They'll ask you how many hons you have.
Where do I want to take my kids someday?
Disney World. For real. I've never been.
When was the last time Andy and I went out without the kids?
Last Friday, I think. We saw "Ironman." Totally good.
What's something you said you'd never do as a mom?
Tell my kids to stop crying. (Fussing, yes. Crying, no.)
Favorite pasttime with my kids?
Schoolwork. They like to do any learning activities, so we do worksheets.
Advice for new moms?
Let your spouse parent. It won't be the same as you.
What is a scary or heartbreaking moment you have had as a mom?
When Claire was about 18 months, I came home Sunday morning after a run to my sister's to get sugar or something, and she was out in the middle of the road. It was many days before I recovered. Many.
When was the last time your kids said "I love you?"
When I let them have computer time this morning.
1If you screw it up, I won't publish you.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
How Mania Elevates the Mundane
Well, if I were my depressed version of me, the following would be the equivalent of torture and I would never have done it all in the first place. Perhaps a balanced individual would just think of it as a chore, even somewhat unpleasant. But I'm ME! I'm me on an upswing! So, I have now become...
SuperBanker!
Yes, for a solid month I have kept a balanced checkbook! (That would be a solid calendar month: April 13 to now. However, to bolster my self-esteem even MORE, I count it as 2 months by way of bank statements. So, 2 bank statement months of balanced checkbook!) I do not look online at my bank balance and think, "YES! I'm goin' to WalMart!!" I look in my CHECK REGISTER (totally official term) and think, "YES!! All my tithing and bills are paid! I'm goin' to WalMart!!" I should get a blue ribbon. I should be a banker1!
I have also become...
SuperHomemaker!
Today is Thursday. Errand Day! My checkbook is balanced (obviously SuperBanker has been here), my menu is made (that would be the work of SuperChef who appears on Wednesday), and my shopping list is made!! I'm waiting for SuperScheduler to show up and tell me when to get it done. It's 11am, and I pick up Charlotte at 2pm, and I have to lunch my kids, nap Gabe, and I ain't a swifty shopper! Looks like it will be when I pick up Charlotte. Maybe what I really need is a superchauffer.
1DO NOT give me your money.
SuperBanker!
Yes, for a solid month I have kept a balanced checkbook! (That would be a solid calendar month: April 13 to now. However, to bolster my self-esteem even MORE, I count it as 2 months by way of bank statements. So, 2 bank statement months of balanced checkbook!) I do not look online at my bank balance and think, "YES! I'm goin' to WalMart!!" I look in my CHECK REGISTER (totally official term) and think, "YES!! All my tithing and bills are paid! I'm goin' to WalMart!!" I should get a blue ribbon. I should be a banker1!
I have also become...
SuperHomemaker!
Today is Thursday. Errand Day! My checkbook is balanced (obviously SuperBanker has been here), my menu is made (that would be the work of SuperChef who appears on Wednesday), and my shopping list is made!! I'm waiting for SuperScheduler to show up and tell me when to get it done. It's 11am, and I pick up Charlotte at 2pm, and I have to lunch my kids, nap Gabe, and I ain't a swifty shopper! Looks like it will be when I pick up Charlotte. Maybe what I really need is a superchauffer.
1DO NOT give me your money.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Kids. What can I say?
The best and the worst of having kids is probably what they say to me.
Claire (age 3): "Mom, this recipe is delicious. Thank you for making it for us!"
Charlotte (age 5): "I'm not talking to you EVER AGAIN! NOT EVER! I'm never coming out of my room AGAIN!"
Claire: "Mom, your tummy is big and squishy."
Charlotte: "I love you all the way to Satur (Saturn)!"
Charlotte (watching "Dancing With the Stars): "Ohps! Not modest! No back, no front, short skirt."
Claire (also watching "Dancing"): "Ooo! Dem's beautiful! Are dem's having dem's wedding?"
Gabe: "Mama! Mama!"
Throw in screaming, flopping, jumping, hand-flapping fits and hysterical, jubilant giggling, squealing and even belly-laughing. You know what Spencer Kimball said. Life's a train ride. Most of the time it's black smoke and ash, but once in a while you catch a glorious view out the window! And, from experience, that view is totally worth it.
Claire (age 3): "Mom, this recipe is delicious. Thank you for making it for us!"
Charlotte (age 5): "I'm not talking to you EVER AGAIN! NOT EVER! I'm never coming out of my room AGAIN!"
Claire: "Mom, your tummy is big and squishy."
Charlotte: "I love you all the way to Satur (Saturn)!"
Charlotte (watching "Dancing With the Stars): "Ohps! Not modest! No back, no front, short skirt."
Claire (also watching "Dancing"): "Ooo! Dem's beautiful! Are dem's having dem's wedding?"
Gabe: "Mama! Mama!"
Throw in screaming, flopping, jumping, hand-flapping fits and hysterical, jubilant giggling, squealing and even belly-laughing. You know what Spencer Kimball said. Life's a train ride. Most of the time it's black smoke and ash, but once in a while you catch a glorious view out the window! And, from experience, that view is totally worth it.
And on goes the saga
Of my teeth. Today was the root canal and temporary crown day, followed by debrisment (that would be the scraping of the nasty crust). I have to say I was pleasantly surprised: the worst parts were the smell and sound (of course) and the keeping my mouth open for 3 hours. They put a little wedge thing in there to rest your jaw on during the procedures, but my jaw joint is SO sore! Docter/Brother Powell said that pain will probably be the worst I have - much more than the actual tooth. So, in two weeks, expect more info.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Mother's Day
I had a really nice Mother's Day. Andy made me a big breakfast of scrambled eggs, bacon (like, SIX pieces!), and biscuits and gravy. AND fruit punch! He served it to me in bed, the girls were so cute about it, and Charlotte brought me that vase she made in preschool filled with flowers1.
We were very late to church because Gabe has a really bad diaper rash. Like, the bleeding, screaming, cringing kind. Yeast. I had already comsulted a pharmacist, and she told me to mix clotrimazole and hydracortizone to treat the yeast and the swelling. So, I sent Andy to the store that morning. Thus, the lateness. We walked into the chapel in the middle of the bread, not realizing it. I was really embarrassed. (This is not the most embarrassing moment of the day.) My parents were there because my nephew Matthew was being ordained to the Aaronic priesthood. So, lots of help with the kids. And the moms received a tulip and a CD of inspiring music. We got one last year, and I really like that as a gift from the ward. It lasts, and it doesn't make me fatter2.
After church, we went right to Sarah's (after stopping at the house to change, etc.) for dinner with Mom and the whole family. This is really the very best part:
Andy made me TWO desserts (we shared)! He made those Queen's Arm that he made at Christmas at Mamu's and Papu's - brazo de reina in spanish since it is a dessert he saw in Chile; and a gorgeous flan. He actually made flan three times to get it right! Now that is dedication!
1She pasted pieces of tissue paper all over a glass vase and then mod podged over the top to coat it.
2Like the brazo de reina and flan won't?
We were very late to church because Gabe has a really bad diaper rash. Like, the bleeding, screaming, cringing kind. Yeast. I had already comsulted a pharmacist, and she told me to mix clotrimazole and hydracortizone to treat the yeast and the swelling. So, I sent Andy to the store that morning. Thus, the lateness. We walked into the chapel in the middle of the bread, not realizing it. I was really embarrassed. (This is not the most embarrassing moment of the day.) My parents were there because my nephew Matthew was being ordained to the Aaronic priesthood. So, lots of help with the kids. And the moms received a tulip and a CD of inspiring music. We got one last year, and I really like that as a gift from the ward. It lasts, and it doesn't make me fatter2.
After church, we went right to Sarah's (after stopping at the house to change, etc.) for dinner with Mom and the whole family. This is really the very best part:
Andy made me TWO desserts (we shared)! He made those Queen's Arm that he made at Christmas at Mamu's and Papu's - brazo de reina in spanish since it is a dessert he saw in Chile; and a gorgeous flan. He actually made flan three times to get it right! Now that is dedication!
1She pasted pieces of tissue paper all over a glass vase and then mod podged over the top to coat it.
2Like the brazo de reina and flan won't?
Friday, May 9, 2008
What kind of a mother am I?!
Andy just found some video he took on his phone of Charlotte when she was newborn, learning to crawl, and first crawling. They are adorable. I looked at them and smiled and laughed at her totally fat arms! No tears for me. Here's a sample:
2-day old Charlotte
Fat Baby Charlotte
Cute, right? The baffling part is that I have tear up EVERY time I watch that ridiculous Mother's Day Hallmark commercial1. So, what's up with that? Am I jaded with my kids? Am I done with the baby stage? Please say no because I want to adopt!! Probably not a baby, though. Do I need to have another teeth dream to interpret this thing? Is this how it is to be well medicated?
1The one where the girl in college records "Mom, you ROCK" and then the card starts playing "Unbelievable" by EMF, and the granny says, "How sweet!" and the mom, all choked up says, "I know!" I'm embarrassed.
Cute, right? The baffling part is that I have tear up EVERY time I watch that ridiculous Mother's Day Hallmark commercial1. So, what's up with that? Am I jaded with my kids? Am I done with the baby stage? Please say no because I want to adopt!! Probably not a baby, though. Do I need to have another teeth dream to interpret this thing? Is this how it is to be well medicated?
1The one where the girl in college records "Mom, you ROCK" and then the card starts playing "Unbelievable" by EMF, and the granny says, "How sweet!" and the mom, all choked up says, "I know!" I'm embarrassed.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Teeth: King of the Mountain
Well, I went to the dentist. Tooth breaking will do that to you. Incidentally, he said that more people break their teeth on soft food than crunchy.
So, my broken tooth needs a crown. Why does it get rewarded when it failed me? Why is it elevated to royalty status above all other teeth? He's the WORST ONE! Perhaps he is like Hamlet's step father: corruption led him to the throne.
And I only cried once at the office (twice in the car).
So, my broken tooth needs a crown. Why does it get rewarded when it failed me? Why is it elevated to royalty status above all other teeth? He's the WORST ONE! Perhaps he is like Hamlet's step father: corruption led him to the throne.
And I only cried once at the office (twice in the car).
Monday, May 5, 2008
Yay for footnotes!
My genius brother taught me how to footnote!1
This whole post will be footnoted!2
Since I have nothing to say, though3
1He is a college graduate.
2It will soon replace many of the parenthesis I use. And I actually cut back on those as I'm typing b/c I know I use them like a crazy mamba jamba. But I speak in parenthetical references a lot. So, that just confirms a lot of my paranoid thoughts.
3so that's it for this post. More footnotes coming soon to a blog near you.
This whole post will be footnoted!2
Since I have nothing to say, though3
1He is a college graduate.
2It will soon replace many of the parenthesis I use. And I actually cut back on those as I'm typing b/c I know I use them like a crazy mamba jamba. But I speak in parenthetical references a lot. So, that just confirms a lot of my paranoid thoughts.
3so that's it for this post. More footnotes coming soon to a blog near you.
It doesn't work that way
My brother, the genius, (you know he's a college graduate), told me how to find my lost post that I had written (please see post: "I screwed up"), and guess what? He was right! It's there. However, I cannot post it. I wrote it when I was up. In fact, the title of the post is "When your up, your up!" However, I am now down. Way down. Breaking a tooth on the softest food in America besides whipped cream, that'll do it to you. It's the equivalent of climbing that long ladder in the game "Chutes and Ladders," you know the one that takes you from space 28 to space 84? And then one spin later landing on the ladder that takes you from 87 to 24. Oh, that slippery slope. Brush your teeth, folks.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Teeth - The Sequel
Remember the dream I had about my teeth falling out? I broke off a piece of my back molar today while eating a soft taco. Mystery solved. Teeth dreams are about teeth. And who breaks a tooth on a soft taco?
The problem with paranoia...
...is that nobody can make it better; they can just make it worse.
Example: I am seriously sucking at cooking recently. I get very upset (already irrational) b/c nothing is turning out or tasting good. And I say this to my husband and family. So then, when they give me any kind of compliment on my food, I think, "Of course they are saying that; they know I'm sensitive and upset that my cooking is bad. They are just saying that to try to make me feel better." I can't even feel like the compliments are genuine b/c I'm so paranoid that they are only to please me and not b/c they are their true feelings. This sucks.
Disclaimer: Thank you for the compliments. I don't intellectually think y'all are all spitting my food out in the trash when I'm not looking. It's just the disease. Although, Vince sure asked where the trash can was an awful lot....
Example: I am seriously sucking at cooking recently. I get very upset (already irrational) b/c nothing is turning out or tasting good. And I say this to my husband and family. So then, when they give me any kind of compliment on my food, I think, "Of course they are saying that; they know I'm sensitive and upset that my cooking is bad. They are just saying that to try to make me feel better." I can't even feel like the compliments are genuine b/c I'm so paranoid that they are only to please me and not b/c they are their true feelings. This sucks.
Disclaimer: Thank you for the compliments. I don't intellectually think y'all are all spitting my food out in the trash when I'm not looking. It's just the disease. Although, Vince sure asked where the trash can was an awful lot....
Saturday, May 3, 2008
I screwed up
I wrote this fabulous post. It was great. I lost it. I don't know how. I think it was Gabe. Sixteen months old and addicted to electronics. He climbs up on the chair all the time and starts banging and clicking like a mad man. I'm pretty sure he knows his time is limited, and I'll come running to stop him, so he tries to get in as much activity as possible. We've tried to trick him with old keyboards and mice that aren't connected, but he isn't fooled. He is looking for screen activity.
The last post was about being up. I was so up! But now I'm down, so I have nothing to say. Other than the usual moaning and groaning. "My kids are bad; I look 4 months pregnant; My house is a dump; I keep messing things up; I'm a bad wife; I'm a bad mom; I'm a bad friend." That sort of thing.
To be sure, I'm paranoid, yes. And my sister Liz informed me yesterday that perhaps I haven't noticed, but my perspective is always that it is my fault. And I didn't used to be that way. I was a blamer. I guess I've swung too far the other way. But when you're paranoid, it ALL seems like your fault. Even having low self-esteem feels like your fault. AND you are pretty sure that everyone else knows and is talking about it when you aren't there. It feels exactly like you've been walking around for twenty minutes and suddenly discover that your skirt is stuck up in your underwear and nobody told you. AND that you are that lady who gets up to bear her testimony every month whether or not she has anything to say. I've been advised, by my very wise and trusted advisors, that the only thing to do is to let it all go and stop even thinking about it. Catch 22 - I CAN'T stop thinking about it because I'm paranoid!
Alright, I'm going back to watch B movies on Saturday Cinema.
The last post was about being up. I was so up! But now I'm down, so I have nothing to say. Other than the usual moaning and groaning. "My kids are bad; I look 4 months pregnant; My house is a dump; I keep messing things up; I'm a bad wife; I'm a bad mom; I'm a bad friend." That sort of thing.
To be sure, I'm paranoid, yes. And my sister Liz informed me yesterday that perhaps I haven't noticed, but my perspective is always that it is my fault. And I didn't used to be that way. I was a blamer. I guess I've swung too far the other way. But when you're paranoid, it ALL seems like your fault. Even having low self-esteem feels like your fault. AND you are pretty sure that everyone else knows and is talking about it when you aren't there. It feels exactly like you've been walking around for twenty minutes and suddenly discover that your skirt is stuck up in your underwear and nobody told you. AND that you are that lady who gets up to bear her testimony every month whether or not she has anything to say. I've been advised, by my very wise and trusted advisors, that the only thing to do is to let it all go and stop even thinking about it. Catch 22 - I CAN'T stop thinking about it because I'm paranoid!
Alright, I'm going back to watch B movies on Saturday Cinema.
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