I love to be called Jen. It is great. Call me Jen every day that you know me. Write it on notes and invitations and your calendar (notice how I just became the social object of your lives).
HOWEVER, I have taken issue with using the name Jen in an official capacity. All of a sudden at church, I'm being referred to as Jen as if it were my given name, and, I gotta tell you, I can't stand it! These are the places it has bugged me: In the church directory. In the past, it has always been Jennifer. I actually introduce myself as Jennifer and write my name on almost everything as Jennifer. Ok, and on rolls. Not all of them, I don't think, which is great. And, here's the one that put me over the edge, I was sustained for a new calling as "Jen Ruggles." That just freaked me out. It felt like someone just used a pet name my husband would use, "All who can sustain Babe Ruggles..."
So, I have BECOME THAT LADY. The lady who, this past Sunday, went into the clerk's office and had them go into the computer and change my "preferred name" from Jen to Jennifer. How it became Jen? I don't know. I'm sure it wasn't a big deal when it was typed in. So I feel like a total hag making a big deal about changing it. But, the thing is, I started feeling all panicky that my name would be changed from Jennifer to Jen without my really liking it, and then, in a few years, everyone who has met me in that amount of time would just think I'm "Jen" instead of "Jennifer called Jen". I KNOW! It's so stupid. I also had it changed on the contact information in the Stake Primary Presidency. Ugh, I'm disgusted with myself.
I can't explain it. The only thing I can think of is - you know my husband Andy. His given name is Andrew, but he's never been called that since birth. And my brother David's first name is Stephen, but he's been called by his middle name since birth. Both of these are intentional by their parents. They wanted their sons to be called these names. It would be weird to call them Stephen or Andrew. I don't even call Andy Andrew, even when I'm mad at him! Alright, so I don't think of my name in this category, and I don't feel comfortable with it moving into this category.
I mean, there are tons of people who use their given names on everything and are called a shortened name by everyone who talks to them! Look at Robert DeNiro! Everyone who knows him and talks about him in interviews calls him Bobby, but you sure don't see Bobby in the movie credits! Same with Sandy Bullock, Bobby Downey, Jr., Jen Aniston (ha! another Jen!), Angie Jolie...
(Hey, Laura, did you know that John Denver's given name was Henry John Deutschendorf Jr.?)
Incidentally, I don't even like my name. So, that makes it even weirder and dumber and argh!! I am so embarrassed at myself! But I guess "Jennifer called Jen by those who know me" is my identity, and it is so uncomfortable to have that changed unawares.
So, carry on as usual calling me Jen and talking about me (as I know you do) as Jen and thinking of me as Jen. But, I swear, if my name appears in the church program as "Jen Ruggles" when I give a talk in March, I'll be crazy(er).
Now, if someone calls me Jenny, them's fightin' words!
18 comments:
Jen/Jennifer/not Jenny-- I do the programs so don't you worry-- it'll be Jennifer Ruggles giving that talk in March.
I have a friend from work who has been called Trisha (her name) all her life. Then she moves to Texas & people (without her permission) start calling her Trish. She's the passive type so she doesn't mind, but then years down the road, she realizes that EVERYONE calls her Trish now & her name in the employee directory even says Trish. She's like, "How did I become Trish without even deciding?!!" I think it's funny.
On another name note-- people who knew me growing up call me Lish (said "Leesh"). But you better bet that if someone who didn't know me growing up calls me that --- ooooooo, I'll be MAD.
Names are so funny.
There is no shortened version and no nickname for a name like Sarah. The only time I've ever been called anything else was in college when Billy called me Sarah Lynn. Everyone thought that's what I went by and started calling me that. I loved being Sarah Lynn. Maybe that's why my life sucks. Because I'm just plain old Sarah again.
I have been aware of your name preference for awhile now. Though you were introduced to me (not by yourself, but by Ruggles family) as Jen, I at first called you that, now most of the time I use Jennifer, as I've gotten used to your preference. And I completely understand it!! I hate when people do that! I type the visiting teaching assignments for our ward, and I make sure to use whatever is in the directory even when I know someone goes by a nickname. I also don't have a nickname-able name, but for some reason I've always realized being called the desired thing is so important! Maybe its because people always misSPELL my name! I really hate that too!
I understand completly, my name is Jonathan and to shorten it is JOn, not John. John is a completly diffrent name, one that does not belong to me. youmight as well write my name a fred if your going to put John. I have either a) corrected people openly if i have to or 2) just ignored it on instant messingers or emails untill they get it right.
Nicknames for Sarah are Sadie and Sally. Don't ask me why - it was probably the crazy British. You know - Hank and Harry for Henry, Polly for Mary, that sort of thing.
Carrie, you're out of luck.
And THANK YOU, Alisha! I knew you do the programs, and guess what? I would've called you :)
I know exactly what you mean about your name. I'm Alison with the nickname of Ali for those who know it. It absolutely drives me crazy when people call me Ali who don't know me. When we were up in Utah, my brother-in-laws whole family called me Ali. It was weird at first, but since they are almost family, I was cool.
I always call you cousin Jen. It just makes it easier in our house to know which Jen I'm talking about. ;)
Oh and Carrie talked about spelling name's wrong. Mine is ALWAYS spelled wrong. I guess I'm used to it by now.
I completely understand. I HATE being called Kim. Hate it intensely. All growing up and in high school, everyone called me Kim no matter how hard I tried. Then I went to college and finally, finally got people to call me Kimberly. Then I moved back here and got a full time job and half the people I know call me Kim despite my repeated assertions that I hate it.
Why do people who have only known me 2 minutes feel they can shorten my name? What do they think makes them so special that they can call me by a nickname without asking my permission? It feels very forward and it bothers me. I never introduce myself as Kim, I always write Kimberly on everything. WHY, PEOPLE, WHY?
Ugh.
So, yeah. I understand! Names are tricky things, yo.
correct me if I'm wrong (or if I spell something wrong) but does not your mother call you Kimmy? Does that bother you? or does she have special powers because she picked your name?
I will always call you Jen. Thats how craig and andy have said it since I first heard of you. For my name everyone calls me whatever they feel like. They could call me meatball and I'd answer...well maybe not
I've never understood why people will shorten someone's name. Robert always introduces himself as Robert, but there are always some people who insist on calling him Bob. And he is not a Bob, so it annoys him.
And, Jon, as Kimberly's mom, I can call her whatever I want!
I remember when Mom was going to yell at andrew for something and she called him by the dog's name. Drew was so mad that he wouldn't let her punish him. he still gets upset about it.
My family calls me Kimmy. All of them. Even relatives I hardly see call me that. I don't mind it, to be honest, but I wouldn't want the entire world calling me that. Every now and then, someone else will call me Kimmy, but I generally prefer Kimberly when I'm not with my family.
My mom picked our names for the nicknames. We are all about nicknames in our family. I guess I never realized how important a person's name is to them. I am one of those people who shortens peoples names automatically. I will make an effort not to do it in the future after reading all of these comments.
Sometimes Gary has the kids call uncle James Jimmy just to irritate him.
ok so on my blog i had to say jen ruggles but notice that i did it with ( ). that is because i have a sister in law named jennifer that goes by jen too. (only people who know her) anywho. I know what your saying. if makes you feel any better i grew up with HORRIBLE nicknames for my name. ashwipe ashhole. yeah my brothers thought they were pretty funny. unfortunately i do not agree. but the one that still sticks to this day is Atlee.
okay -- SO YES TO THIS. I'm Julianna. Period. My mom, dad and 2 brothers call me Julie. THAT'S IT. If you're not on that list -- you call me Julianna. Some of my friends call me Jules... and that's fine... .but varies friend by friend.
Sludge. That's my name now. It developed over a serious dislike for the word "fudge" as an expletive... My husband at first call me muthafudge to get my goat and then "softened" it to muthasludge when Katherine was born... And now it's just sludge... and I love it. Somehow it's become so much more romantic than "Amanda." if I'm ever called Amanda, I know I'm in trouble.
I love to be called Les by my friends (just as long as it isn't with the 'z' sound at the end...Lez). I suppose that it makes me feel special or loved to be referred to as Les...I guess similar to a pet name. I once worked at an office where there was another Leslie on staff so I was referred to as Leslie Ann. I would answer the phone, "Thank you for calling LMI Finishing. This is Leslie Ann. How may I assist you?" I loved being called Leslie Ann and spelled it with a hyphen and an "e" (Leslie-Anne) or I would connect the two in to one LONG name (LeslieAnne). It looked So fancy all spelled out like that! So really call me what you like but if you want me to feel special Les, Leslie-Anne or Princess will suit me just fine. As for the whole formal church thing, I get it and whole-heartedly agree!
ditto to the first kimberly comment.
Post a Comment