Shopping

[Update: I was up until 5 am on the last post so I didn't take my kids to the dentist at all. Thanks for asking.]

Ok, I am blind, I am deaf, I have one church outfit, and yesterday the zipper busted. I sound like a friggin' Halmark special event. The point is, I am scheduling a day for an eye test, a hearing test, and then shopping to cover my Sunday self. About time, I say. Maybe at the next girls' night out I won't have to squint and cup my hands around my ears the whole time. One can always dream.

Regarding shopping, I can't stand it. "Loathe" comes to mind. Every aspect of it. I hate clothes in general. I hate picking them out and trying them on and spending the money on them. And then I hate getting dressed. I don't want options. I don't want to "mix and match." That's why the one church outfit - or uniform, if you will - worked great for me. Ideally, I would have seven complete outfits hanging in my closet - including accessories and shoes and bag. And, of course, seven lovely sets of pjs - my outfit of choice. Side note: I really like to have only one of everything. One pair of flip flops, one pair of tennies, one bra, etc. I just can't keep up with stuff. I currently have three pair of flip flops, two pair of tennies, and two bras. But I can only find one of each, so it is basically the same.

I'm really annoyed with that zipper because I've only washed that skirt TWICE. I was very very careful with it. I only wore it 3 hours a week. I didn't eat in it. I didn't sleep in it (surprisingly). This is such crap. And I paid, like, $60 for it! Rip off.

Should I ever be on "What Not to Wear," - which I would loathe and probably decine - but if I were, I would show those two idiots the clothes I bought with their $5000, and then return it all and put floors in my house. Floors don't care what you wear.

Oh, and that's the other thing. I hate all that clothes crap, but it really sucks not to have anything to wear. A lose-lose situation. Can't be a nudist, can't stand buying clothes. That's why I want the seven outfits scenario. And a personal shopper. Who just picks it out, and I like it, and it actually fits, and it is modest, and we don't have to talk about it. I also loathe talking about clothes.

And, while I'm thinking about it, here's another pet peeve. I cannot stand those internet sites that advertise modest clothing, and then it's all the same stuff at the mall! Those dresses to the knee will show everything when I bend over just as much as a dress from Kohl's. Those long cap-sleeved t-shirts are just as tight and often too short or too low-cut to fit the bill. So, what is that? Stupid, that's what.