I started piano lessons in early elementary school and continued until the end of high school. I only got good enough to play for myself and the Primary, and now I've lost most of it. I never memorized much. I was always extremely nervous and sick to my stomach to perform. I had only a few recitals; my teachers were all in the ward. Until my last teacher who was highly accomplished and accredited and made me do theory and competitions. I nearly died. I quit. I had to memorize, and my fingers shook so badly that I could barely hit the keys. I used to bite my nails on the bus to her house b/c they had to be short. If she heard them clicking on the keys, she would tut tut at me and make me clip them at her house. I hated that. Plus she was the first teacher that didn't give me stickers when I passed off a song. Probably because I never passed off a song. I could never play well enough.
I miss playing. When I get on the piano at home, the kids take it as an open invitation. And it is so discouraging to see the skills I've lost. I can't ever play a song without wrong notes. Ever. And if I get close, I can't play with expression, which is not a forte of mine. Sight reading was always my strength. As I've gotten older, I've heard more and more really gorgeous, skilled piano music, so what I play isn't pretty to my ears and that makes playing less enjoyable. But I used to pound the keys when I was a teenager.
1 comment:
It is so interesting to hear you say you're not good at playing the piano because I always think how good you are when I hear you play. I took piano lessons for something like 10 years & can't even play in primary.
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